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I wanted to write something beautiful for you by Aritri Dutta

Artwork: The Letter by Mary Cassatt

I wanted to write something beautiful for you.

A few scattered words here and there

Like mutilated arms

Trying to make sense of their existence

And breathing the air smelling like sawdust, moth eaten handkerchiefs

Wiping off the extra marmalade from your chapped lips

and your tears when wanted me to write something beautiful for you

and burnt broth

Bubbling away in glorious ignorance

Just like you had left them

Motionless. Fragile. Dead.

The commas never fall into place. They cannot hear me, I think.

But I hear the coffee machine every morning

Brewing coffee without you

And Barney wagging his way into the garage

Without you.

The yellow is wearing off. So I painted over it on Monday and Tuesday and every other day

Without you.

I am clumsy with full stops.

I never know where to put them.

But sometimes they write me. as a beautiful woman]

But mostly as a sad, miserable failure.

And I let them. Like I let you.

I want to write something beautiful for you, something made out of a dream

But I cannot dream tonight. I cannot dream without you.


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